It’s an unfortunate fact of life that no sooner do we become aware of our own bodies, that we start comparing them to others. So it goes with our height, our biceps, our six-pack (or lack thereof) and — inevitably — our dicks. Is it big enough? Is his bigger? Is mine ‘normal’?

Here, we unpack all those questions you’ve ever had about your penis and give you the answers you’ve been looking for.

Does she care about the size of my 🍆?

Is she actually concerned about the size of your penis? The answer: it’s pretty unlikely. In a survey of over 50,000 men and women, 85% of women said they are satisfied with their partner’s penis size. However, only 55% of men reported feeling satisfied with their own penis size.

You might have heard stories about ‘size queens’ — women who care about size, and size only — but what this data tells us is that your lady is probably pretty happy with what you’ve got.

When we asked over 2,000 women across the world what was important to them in the bedroom, what consistently came across in their answers was that women care a lot more about things like foreplay, intimacy and a sense of connection than something like your size. So the conclusion: no, she doesn’t really care about the size of your penis. She probably cares a lot more about you.

MORE: Want to know more about what women actually care about in bed? Find out here.

Setting realistic sexpectations

If you watch porn, it’s easy to see those guys on screen and feel a bit insecure about your own size. But the fact is — and this may come as a surprise to some of you, gents — porn is not real life.

Let’s look at the numbers. The length of the average male porn star’s penis is 8” (about 20cm) erect, while the average guy’s penis is roughly 5.8” (about 14cm). Porn tends to be a self-selecting industry for guys with big dicks, the same way modelling is full of very tall, very thin women.

Porn can be a fun, easy way to explore sexual fantasies alone or with a partner, but don’t let those big D’s get you down. Use porn for your pleasure, not to compare yourself.

Is there a way to make it bigger?

Men make more searches asking how to enhance the size of their penis than how to tune a guitar, make an omelette or change a tire. There are hundreds of websites selling penis enlargement treatments and penis growth remedies, but honestly, there just isn’t the evidence to prove that they work.

Here’s the rundown of some of the penis enlargement methods and cosmetic enhancements available on the internet and what they actually do (or don’t do):

Penile extenders, penis stretchers and penis pumps: These aim to stretch the penis over a long period of time to expand muscle tissue. The truth is they only increase the length of a flaccid penis — they won’t make your penis bigger when it’s erect.
Natural penis growth remedies and treatments: These come in the form of herbal supplements and naturopath remedies made from food and plant-based ingredients. However, there’s no scientific research to suggest that any herbal treatments will do anything for your dick size.
Penis enlargement pills, supplements and hormones: Like the natural remedies listed above, there’s no evidence that these will do anything at all, and the best you can realistically hope for is no harmful side effects (it won’t surprise you to learn that these companies aren’t always totally transparent about their ingredients).
Penis implants and injections: These are prosthetic modifications and intricate surgeries carried out by plastic surgeons. Because every penis is different and just the way nature intended, these surgeries can run the risk of complications and infection.

MORE: Ready to take back control of your 🍆?

If you really want to make your dick bigger, the best thing you can do is to maintain a healthy weight to keep the area around your penis free of suprapubic fat — this will ensure you get the maximum amount of blood flow to your penis and reach your maximum erect size.

There are some really easy cosmetic things you can do as well. Try trimming your pubic hair — you’ll be surprised to see how much bigger it looks just by removing a bit of hair. It’ll make you wonder why you’ve never man-scaped before.

Time to do you 😊🍆

Results from a study of over 4,000 men from the Archives of Sexual Behaviour, found that one of the keys to a happy sex life could be something as simple as self-acceptance. They used the ‘Index of Male Genital Image’ (IMGI) to study the men’s perceptions of their genital size, and perhaps unsurprisingly the men who were dissatisfied with their genital size were less likely to report being sexually active.

It really is true: confidence is everything. And the first step to being confident is feeling comfortable in your own skin. If you’re feeling insecure about your penis size, you should know two things: